Dear Mr.Hasser,
I was looking over your most interesting website, and may I just say: Job well done! Your features and articles are entertaining, your design is solid, and your personal hygine seems above reproach! In fact, the more that I peruse your pages, the more turned on I get. Please allow me to be quite frank, because if I could get my greedy little hands on you this very moment I would rip off your pants...